Saturday, March 7, 2009

U P D A T E ;

Posted in by Kaay | Edit
well , lets start off by sayinq , i ' m officially single . we ' ve been dating since the 1oth grade . separate schools most of the time , but we made it ! now that we go tot the same school - our relationship had gotten REALLY rocky . between some of his ' friends ' trying to talk to me - not "knowing " i was his girl , to people telling me things about him and girls and telling him things about me and other boys . . we really started to fall apart . everything was ALL good before . but now i must say - we are at the lowest of lows .
basically , we broke up because he doesnt think my parents like him .. but , in all r e a l i t y ; THEY DO ! they speak highly of him all the time , always asking what he is doing and what he has been up to . really , it 's his parents that DONT LIKE Me! but whatever , do you know how many people in this world dont like me ? i could really give two shits . so - we broke up like Feb18th and i haven ' t reallly talked to him since . .
so this week i met this new guy who 's really cool - he 's one of his friends . i 've seen him around school plenty of times and i never spoke . he is acually on the basketball team that i cheer for . lOl . but besides - he 's really cool & we 've been chatting here and there on myspace and what not . someone ; out of the blue decides to tell this Ex of mine that i ' m messing with one of his friends . . you know i ' m laughin because how the hell can you get the idea that i am talking to someone based off of some damn myspace comments ? so , i ' m just extremely weakk at this .
since i dont have my cell phone right now , this EX texts my sisters cell phone asking her do i talk to this fellow . . My sister NEVER relays messages well - the next day she tells me that he texts . . i wasn ' t really thinnking about it ! because i was too busy shopping for my prom dress that i didn ' t care . like and hour and a half later he texts again & i responded . . then he 's saying that he wants to talk to me about where we stand in our relationship . . okay , well - i ' m willing to talk - but , i really dont have much to say . .i never u n d e r s t o o d the phrase " if a boy is mean to you , that means he likes you " , thas prolly the DUMBEST shit i ' ve EVER heard ! lately he was like ignoring me and stuff - so , i was just like fuck it ! i give up . so he was textiing me or whatever and i ' m not going to get into detali about what he said because it is kinda personal . . but , what he said really qot to me and made me think !
i didnt know what to say back in a since like this . . i was dazed & confused . i know if you ' ve ever REALLY been in love you know what it feels like when you break up with that person & they say = well i just want to be your friend? well , now he does . i told him that i didnt want to be his friend at all ! like - i can 't . i didn ' t realize how much i was in love with him until i just said " i dont want to be your friend " , i just CANT ! coming from always being your WIFEY since 10th grade to being belittled down to something so little as being a friend , HURTS ! i 've been trying to stray away from him a little . . . but , i dont think it 's working ! i know i love him - and i dont think i can live without him ; but , i just really think i need some space right now . . it'll help me realize what i want , and what i want to do , and who i want to be . . so for right now - my relationship is on hold ... status remains single .


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